POSITIVITY
  • Workshops
    • Calendar
  • Resources
    • Shop
    • Blog
    • Books
    • Podcast >
      • Hashtag Positivity Podcast
      • On A Positive Note Podcast
      • It's the Climb Podcast
    • Quotes
    • Free Minicourses >
      • Magic Words
    • Grow with the Flow
    • Principles of Happiness
  • Connect
Magic Words

MINDSET

6/14/2021

0 Comments

 
"You might not be able to always control everything that happens to you, but what you can always control is how you let what happens to you affect you." — Jonas Cain
​Read the full story ⬇︎
When the muggers shoved me against the side of the van in Pittsburgh and demanded I give them my wallet, my only thought was how to get out of the situation as fast as possible without getting hurt. 

This was my first visit to the Steel City, and it wasn’t exactly starting off on a positive note. We had just finished unloading the band’s equipment into the club and I went back to the tour van to grab one final suitcase before setting up for my magic performance. This was also my first time touring as an opening act, and while it was an amazing opportunity, it also introduced me to the sometimes-cruel realities of the world.

When the muggers approached, I was all alone—an easy target. I felt defenseless.

Scared.

Violated.

Disappointed.

Disappointed, because just earlier that day we visited a record store and I nearly bought the album Horse With No Name, but in an effort to be frugal I decided not to. Instead, I just got The Button-Down Mind of Bob Newhart. With the wallet being stolen, however, frugality didn’t really matter. In hindsight, it would have been better to tie up the money in vinyl rather than paper. Considering the circumstances, it was rather disappointing.

But mostly, I was scared. 

It’s been said that the same things that make us laugh can also make us cry, and though some may criticize laughter as nothing more than a defense mechanism that deflects problems instead of actually dealing with them, I contend that laughter can be a worthy tool to enrich the good times and help make the bad times a little more bearable. So in the days following the mugging, I took some time to process what had happened and soon found a way to laugh about it. I mused:

“The Steel city should really be called the ‘Steal’ City.”

(Maybe not the most brilliant joke, but it did provide worthy medicine to relieve the sting of the situation.)

The difference between a positive mindset and a negative mindset is that a negative mindset looks for problems and focuses on what’s wrong without caring to do anything about it, while a positive mindset takes stock of the available opportunities, resources, skills, and knowledge and then uses these tools to grow forward.

(And the difference between real positivity and toxic positivity is that toxic positivity simply shoves problems into a closet and puts on a smile without actually doing the work to grow from it. In other words, it’s not enough to laugh in face of adversity without also doing something to back it up.)

We may not be able to control what happens to us, but what we can control is our experience of what happens. A positive mindset empowers us with an internal locus of control, encouraging us to approach challenges with fascination, curiosity, and wonder.

This imaginative attitude may be in stark contrast to those with a realistic “button-down” approach—those who might otherwise prefer to be right rather than to be happy—but just as the horse with no name was let go to run free, so too did I let the nameless muggers go, putting down the poison of resentment to starve the victim mentality that might otherwise keep me entrapped in a loop of negative rumination. 

Reflection 
When things don’t go as planned, do you tend to approach it with a positive mindset or a negative mindset? How might choosing fascination over frustration help to improve your experience of such disappointments?
​
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Picture
    JONAS CAIN, M.Ed.

    Facilitator

    Jonas Cain, M.Ed. is a storyteller, magician, musician, and facilitator of fascination on a mission to help you experience abiding joy.
    ​
    ​
    Connect with Jonas today to discuss your challenges, goals, and obstacles.

    Picture

    Magic Words

    All
    Acceptance
    Action
    Adapt
    Adventure
    Affirmation
    Ally
    April Fools
    Atonement
    Attention
    Authenticity
    Balance
    Banner
    Beautiful
    Behavior
    Belief
    Birthday
    Boat
    Books
    Boundaries
    Breathe
    Care
    Celebration
    Challenge
    Change
    Character
    Cheese
    Choice
    Clarity
    Climb
    Commitment
    Communication
    Compassion
    Compliant
    Confidence
    Connection
    Courage
    Creativity
    Discernment
    Discovery
    Disruption
    Dominant
    Doubt
    Dream
    Education
    Empower
    Encourage
    Engage
    Enjoy
    Enjoyment
    Enthusiasm
    Excel
    Excellence
    Explore
    Facilitate
    Fascination
    Fear
    Focus
    Forgiveness
    Friendship
    Gap
    Generosity
    Gentle
    Grand
    Gratitude
    Growth
    Happiness
    Health
    Hermit
    Honor
    Hope
    Humility
    Humor
    Independence
    Influence
    Influencing
    Initiative
    Inspiration
    Integrity
    Interest
    Invention
    Invest
    Journey
    Joy
    Kindness
    Lane
    Laughter
    Leadership
    Legacy
    Listen
    Live
    Love
    Magic
    Mentor
    Mindfulness
    Mindset
    Momentum
    Motion
    Motivation
    Necessity
    Opportunity
    Passion
    Pathway
    Patience
    Perseverance
    Persistence
    Perspective
    Play
    Positivity
    Possibility
    Preparation
    Presence
    Prize
    Process
    Purpose
    Quantify
    Recognition
    Reflection
    Relationships
    Relax
    Remembrance
    Repentance
    Resilience
    Resolution
    Resources
    Respect
    Responsibility
    Reward
    Sacrifice
    Sail
    Smile
    Stasis
    Steady
    Storm
    Summit
    Support
    Surprise
    Talent
    Teamwork
    Thanksgiving
    Ticket
    Time
    Today
    Tools
    Transformation
    Trust
    Understand
    Value
    Vision
    Wind
    Wonder

    Picture

    Archives

    May 2023
    April 2023
    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017

Picture

JONAS CAIN
​Facilitator of Fascination
800-969-9778 | ​jonas@hashtagpositivity.com

#POSITIVITY

WORKSHOPS | RESOURCES | CONNECT

© 2023
  • Workshops
    • Calendar
  • Resources
    • Shop
    • Blog
    • Books
    • Podcast >
      • Hashtag Positivity Podcast
      • On A Positive Note Podcast
      • It's the Climb Podcast
    • Quotes
    • Free Minicourses >
      • Magic Words
    • Grow with the Flow
    • Principles of Happiness
  • Connect