"Coming to terms with our true natures and who we really are has always been a fascination to humans." — Hugh Jackman
Do you tend to get frustrated or do you tend to get fascinated?
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One of the most common questions I'm asked is how to I stay so positive even when there's so much to be frustrated about.
It takes more than a blind eye and sweeping things under the rug, I assure you! It takes real authentic hard work!
Last week I shared a story about how I spent the first half of my life under the belief that I'm not athletic, and how this belief informed my choices. Well, these choices led to a less than healthy lifestyle, and at the age of thirty I was diagnosed with hypertension and diabetes and told that I would have to be on medication the rest of my life. I didn't like that prospect and instead of getting frustrated by the state of affairs, I became fascinated by it.
And here we find the key lesson: when we're frustrated we wish for a brighter future but aren't willing to do anything about it; but when we're fascinated we hope for a brighter future and then get curious and wonder how we can make it happen.
How do we choose fascination over frustration? I started with these three questions:
These higher quality questions worked to snap me out of the victim mentality and instead put me into the hero mentality.
For example, when I was told I had to take medications the rest of my life, I decided to do something about it by asking those questions. Yes, I did the standard "diet and exercise" but we all know how that works out...usually after a few weeks or maybe a few months we revert back to our old ways. Instead, I made a game of it.
Instead of just doing cardio to get to a healthier weight, I started running so I could qualify to go skydiving. I was 70 pounds over the weight limit, so I became not just motivated to lose weight for a health goal, I was motivated so I could experience something amazing! And in May of 2015, two years after the diagnosis, I finally got to go skydiving for the first time! It was an incredible experience!
But not only that, I had changed my lifestyle so much that my doctors told me that I no longer needed medication because I no longer had hypertension and no longer had diabetes. I had beaten the odds! And all it took was a change in my belief about myself, and the decision to choose fascination over frustration.
What will fascination look like in your life?
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Jonas Cain is a Positivity Consultant, Learning Experience Designer, and Facilitator of Fascination for Hashtag Positivity, a social entrepreneurship helping emerging leaders and their influencers stay alive, smile, and thrive through the development of social emotional skills.